Session Twenty-Seven: The Squire’s Tale

A Proper Waaagh

The orks by the bonfire at the bottom of the cavern hear the altercation between Andre and the ork at the top of the cavern. They shout questions to their companion, and are excited to hear that ‘umies have infiltrated their cave. Happy that they will now be able to, “execute a proper WAAAGH!” they grab their weapons.

The group of orks leaves the screaming woman in the cage behind and race across the cavern floor to the staircase that leads up to the bridge. A few see Magnus, Garnier, and Sabina and peel off to face them, while the rest ascend the stairs and surge across the bridge.

The fight is desperate and quite bloody. Notable deeds include:

• Sabina blowing away an ork at point blank range with her pistol.
• Garnier dancing around an ork and avoiding injury completely.
• Magnus breaking away from the orks, running over to the cage, and freeing the screaming woman.
• The screaming woman joining the battle on the company’s side, hurling insults, obscenities, and herself at the greenskins. She wields a small, curious-looking knife to good effect against the orks.
• Any wounds inflicted by the woman’s knife seem to bleed profusely. Indeed, several of the orks were apparently injured by the knife prior to the start of the battle. They are forced to fight with open, bleeding wounds.
• Henri stands firm between his companions on the bridge and six charging orks.
• Several members of the company push orks off the bridge to their bloody deaths.
• Sir Henri notes that one of the orks in the back ranks is frustrated, because the other orks are preventing him from entering the melee. Sir Henri convinces the ork to throw one of his companions off the bridge and take his place. The ork does.
• Proving that no clever gambit goes unpunished, the ork then takes the opportunity to bring his choppa down on Sir Henri’s head, splitting both the knight’s helmet and skull. A pall falls over the company as Sir Henri’s body topples lifeless onto the bridge.

The Angry Woman--Slightly Less Angry

Kludd the Voracious

As the battle rages, something very large stirs in one of the deepest, darkest corners of the cave and stomps its way over to the bonfire. When it steps into the firelight, the company is horrified to see that it is a huge female ogre. The ogre carries a gargantuan shovel and carries a crossbow-wielding goblin in a wicker basket on her back.

The orks and the goblins cheer and chant, “Kludd, Kludd, Kludd!”

The company, still mourning the loss of Sir Henri, take firmer grips on their weapons and prepare to meet this new threat.

But then, Kludd says, “What going on here? Why you interrupt my nap with all this noise!”

The battle ends abruptly, and the orks and goblins become shamefaced as they realize they have irritated their leader. Garnier parlays with Kludd the Voracious and promises that, if she lets the company leave with the orks’ angry captive, they promise to never bother her again.

Kludd agrees. Apparently, the orks’ prisoner never stopped yelling, which made it difficult for Kludd to nap. Kludd also goes on to say that her warband is still licking their wounds from being pushed out of their mountain stronghold by the skaven, and that they should not be picking fights with humans. She then asks the company if they have anything for her to eat.

The company apologizes profusely, having brought nothing worthwhile to sate Kludd’s massive appetite. Kludd waves them away irritably before picking up a corpse of a nearby ork and biting off its head. The company takes this as their cue to leave, dragging Sir Henri’s corpse behind them.

KLUDD!

What Became of Sir Henri

Sir Henri awakens on a bier surrounded by yellow flowers. He is greeted by a very tall, smiling man in a yellow robe, who says that he is delighted to see Sir Henri again.

The two men exchange pleasantries. Sir Henri, guessing at the figure’s true identity, says that he very much enjoyed the joust when the two men had met previously. This causes the yellow robed man to giggle and prance around the room, all the while applauding Sir Henri for his cleverness. The man says that not even Pierre made that connection.

The yellow robed man makes all manner of strange and cryptic statements, sliding quickly from one topic to another. Sir Henri struggles to both keep up with the man and get a straight answer out of him. Among the few things that Sir Henri learns definitively is that the yellow robed man is one of the Ruinous Powers.

The man then tells Sir Henri that he may ask a single question, which he might then deign to answer.

Sir Henri asks, “what is your weakness?”

The man responds that he, “delights in foiling plans. All plans. Any plans. Any time. Anywhere. But the problem, you see, is that if someone foils my plans, well, then, I have to let them do it. Otherwise, it would be very hypocritical of me.”

Sir Henri then wakes up to see a very concerned Pierre kneeling over him.

Out of the Caves

The company returns to the encampment near the walls of Vierzon. Pierre tends to Sir Henri while the rest of the company tends to the very angry woman.

The woman, who is much calmer now, introduces herself as Charlotte, squire and daughter of Dame Britolette. She says that she isn’t quite sure what happened to her, but that she went wandering outside of Vierzon to “quiet her mind” when she was attacked by orks and dragged underground. Charlotte notes that the orks allowed her to keep her dagger, which she wielded whenever one of them got bored and challenged her to a fight.

Magnus, suspecting that Charlotte’s dagger is magical in nature, asks if he can hold onto it for her. Charlotte refuses and says that this is her only remaining weapon since the orks took her sword. This prompts the company to present the well-made sword they had found in the camp, which turns out to be Charlotte’s stolen weapon.

After a few more questions, Charlotte confirms that, yes, she bought the knife off of Ludovico Giallo and that, yes, a kindly monk in Brionne offered to write a prayer for her in his book. She pulls out a tattered scrap of yellow paper and shows it to the company. It reads:

“Great Lady, hear me, Charlotte wishes to acquire a blade worthy of her hand.”

The company is interrupted by Pierre, who lets out a shout of triumph. He excitedly tells the others that he was able to bring Sir Henri back from the brink of death. At that moment a woozy, but very much alive, Sir Henri starts to sit up.